I leave Cuba with a strange feeling. The feeling that I am missing something. That I am missing something to get to know, to see, to taste, to feel. I don´t know, but I feel I am missing something to be lived here. I leave with an incomplete feeling. Saying I have loved Cuba is not what comes to my head in the first place, to be honest. However, I feel something special. That kind of feeling that only those places that really get deep into you leave on you when you set off.
Out of all the countries and cultures I have gotten to know in my life, Cuba is, without any doubt, the most curious and complex one. Almost unreachable. I wonder whether actual Cuban people really get to understand all the ins and outs of their own culture.
I have spent two weeks debating myself between the dichotomy of "I like it - I don´t like it (so much)" and I remain in the same confusion or worse.
When I reach the conclusion that "EVERYTHING" in this country, even the apparently most arbitrary and altruist act has a price... there you go! I find myself face down with the exception that confirms the rule. Cause yeah, the rule exists, I would say. But it seems a beautiful face and an honest smile have much more power than I thought.
One thing I have not managed to get used to is to feeling like a "walking dollar". It is a real pity because I know I have missed the opportunity to enrich myself in conversations with many people. This, just in order to avoid having to face, for the 20th time in the same day, the rip-off of the tourist or the great question: "And would you not have a spare dollar?, a cuc?". Seriously, I wish I could help everyone, nuns did a good job with me at school, but I can´t.
I leave with my self-esteem skyrocketing, that is true. Even though, that hasn´t got much merit in Cuba. They already say it, for Cuban men, women, music and rum are the priority. I got it clear. Anyway, although it may get to be a bit saturating sometimes, I think I am gonna miss so much masculine attention from time to time, hehe.
I have not met "my Cuban man", against best omens. But I must admit I have seen the most attractive men here, with those sensual looks and that seemly natural playing. Cuba stars my list. I am in to the chocolate world, and if it is with a Latin rhythm, even more.
But what puts the most delicious icing to the Cuban cake, together with that joyful cadence, the charm and the sparkle in the eyes of its people, is music. It has me hooked, like a hard drug would. Unbelievable, I already feel the withdrawal and have not left yet. Cuba is a bomb of contained art. Spectacular. I have seen some of the best things of my life here. I have discovered Cuban jazz, that makes me quiver and lifts my soul. Jazz, salsa, fusion music, Afro-Cuban and even the-so-rejected-by-me regeton, turns me on in this island.
I know it won´t take me long to come back here cause, anyway, Cuba has got me hooked up.
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